It Only Takes One Time

Posted on Thu Feb 24th, 2011 @ 11:20am by Commander Raven Adams

453 words; about a 2 minute read

Mission: On Typhon Station
Location: Holodeck / Raven's Quarters
Timeline: Immediately after Mixed Emotions

ON

Raven sat motionless for a while, Skylar's last words echoing through her mind. I care far too deeply, to show you how much those words hurt. Each time she felt more keenly his disappointment in her, his pain at her reaction. The feeling that he was washing his hands of her.

She'd reached out to him before he left the holodeck, felt the telepathic connection, but he brushed her off and kept going. She'd hoped for more, but expected no less. How could someone like Skylar care for her once he knew what kind of person she really was? He'd seen all but the deepest, darkest memories -- the ones she kept locked away. How could he love someone like that?

Raven wished so desperately that he could... Had she come to realize that she loved him only when it was too late?

The thought chased her out of the holodeck and to her quarters as she tried to escape the memories of her stupidity. Why was it that every time she cared about someone she had to sabotage it? The more she cared, the bigger the sabotage.

She could still feel his thoughts in the back of her mind, pounding away at her like waves on the shore, reminding her of how foolish she was.

She began to clean her quarters. She took down all her dragons and ravens, dusted them, wiped the shelves, and rearranged them. it kept her mind focused. Sort of. In the back of her mind, Skylar's thoughts pulsed with disappointment.

She finished cleaning and sat down to meditate. She had to get her thoughts back under control or she'd go nuts. Skylar's thoughts were still underlining her own. By now she should be alone in her head. She felt... haunted. There had to be a reason he was still there.

The only time she'd heard of anything like what she was experiencing was when her mother taught her about bonding. But she and Skylar weren't bonded. All they'd done was... Oh crap.

Raven sat down hard. They couldn't be, could they? She reached out to Skylar, needed to tell him what she suspected -- and hit a mental wall. He was focused on his work to the exclusion of all else. When she gently prodded he pushed her away.

Now what was she going to do? As far as she knew, Betazoids and Vulcans bonded for life. And Skylar didn't want her anymore.

She was in trouble. She picked up one of the pillow cushions and held it tightly to her chest. All the meditation in the world couldn't get her out of this one.

OFF

Commander Raven Adams
Chief Intelligence Officer
Starbase Typhon

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